by Daniel Chiam
In my first part of the series -
Friends First and Not Target, we end the subject with go and make friends first. Now guys, it is important for you to understand that our goal here (or at least my goal) is for a long term relationship. The one that can end in marriage, kids, grandchildren and till death do us apart.
The thing about wanting to have a good long term relationship, is that you must willing to invest in time, effort and patience. Good relationship doesn't happened overnight. You must build it up from ground zero.
Communications is the main material to build a good and strong foundation. At the friend stage, you are being given a comfort zone to initiate conversation whenever you want. Good evening, how was your day so far? Hey remember about the event that I told you about last time? Yada yada yada... you get the point.
Get comfortable as friend and get to know as much as possible about each other. Don't jump into conclusion too quick and start assuming things. Assumption always make things worse. Remember, building good relationship takes a lot of time. Learn to give chances to discover about each other; basically do some activities together.
Now the most common mistakes at the early stage of this level is when the feeling starts to intervene, and we start to entertain that feeling. We have the urge or a sudden confident that we are ready to take it to the next level. We starts to ignore the fact of how little we know about each other, how comfortable we are around each other and the compatibility of our purpose in life. That feeling is called -
infatuation.
It happened sometimes and it's important that you understand what that feeling were, instead of beating down yourself so hard when you are being rejected. Not everyone will fail, but whats the percentage of success when you try to rush things?
All I'm trying to say is, don't rush. Take your time and build that bridges among friends. Communicate with them and see if you can get along in every situation. As friend you get to learn how to deal with each other, witness the good and the bad about each other and most importantly it helps you to discover is she's the right one for you. Once you get to know your circle of friends, then only you start highlighting your potential target.
If you have a problem talking to a girl, then I suggest you learn how - NOW.